Horny Goat Chocolate Peanut Butter Porter

This can was left all by itself in the unloved single section of Canals. It looks like it may have hit the floor a few times too. I needed to fill a six, so this came home too.


ABV: 6.5%

Style: American Porter

Trivia: According to the brewery website, “A full bodied porter that gets its dark, luscious color from the generous use of roasted malts. You’ll get just the right amount of chocolate and peanut butter to question whether you’re drinking a glass of delicious suds or popping a peanut butter cup in your mouth.”

Random: When I was a kid, I loved having peanut butter and chocolate chip sandwiches.

This brew poured with a finger of tan head that dissipated slowly and left some lacing on the glass. The body was a dark brown color with no visible carbonation due to the color. The nose was all peanut butter, like sticking your nose in a jar of Skippy. What I didn’t get was chocolate or roasted malts, just straight peanut butter. The taste had a lot more balance and depth. It started with milk chocolate and roasted malts. It then went into intense peanut butter and sweetness. At first, I enjoyed it. But after drinking it after a few sips, the roasted malt bitterness (which became borderline acrid) was in opposition to the peanut butter and made it disjointed. It has a medium-thick body with light carbonation, which could have been increased and would have helped the beer. The finish was long with peanut butter and a roasted malt residue. A can was $1.50, which came to $.13 per ounce. I didn’t hate this beer, and I think it was one of the better beers that combines peanut butter and traditional porter flavors, but they need to get rid of the weird bitter acrid thing to make me want more than one.

Untappd Rating: 3.5/5.0

Horny Goat Horny Blonde

Six more days to go until end of quarter is officially over. Can you tell that I’m excited? I just feel exhausted all the time and it takes me a few weeks after it’s over to get back to normal. I’m trying to keep up with the reviews and this was another beer that came in a mixed pack. It also had some other beers from Horny Goat that I already reviewed, so let’s get on with this one.


ABV: 5%

Style: Light Lager

Trivia: According to the brewery website, “Lagers are an American tradition, and so are blondes. You’ll find this pale lager both bright and crisp up front, and perfectly balanced by a hint of German hops on the end.”

Random: Based on the can, I expected an American Blonde Ale, not a Light Lager.

This beer poured with a one finger, white head that dissipated slowly and left no lacing on the glass. A slight white crown was left on top of the clear, straw yellow body. There was generous carbonation visible. The nose was clean with German hops, grass and mineral water. The taste was very light and crisp with straw, German hops and grass. Mineral water was there was well. The body was light with high carbonation. It had a long finish with the same grass and straw that I got in the taste. This was $1.33 for the can, which broke down to $.11 per ounce, which is pretty affordable. But, this beer was really, really boring. It would be a slightly better substitute for a macro, but I wouldn’t have this again.

Untappd Rating: 3.0/5.0

Horny Goat Archer Apple Brown Ale

On Sunday, the other half and I headed out to Philly before going to my sister’s for Mother’s Day. We went to the Art Star Craft Bazaar, which we also did last year. We picked up a bunch of things for the house, one of my favorites being a plush narwhal head for the wall. I can’t wait to figure out where to put it. Anyways, let’s get to the beer.


ABV: 5.4%

Style: American Brown Ale

Trivia: According to the brewery website, “Archer Apple Brown Ale has all the apple cider flavor you want in a brown ale without any of the drawbacks. Two-row, chocolate and caramel malts and oats anchor a flavor profile that’ll make your taste buds quiver, as fresh-pressed Door County apple cider blended into the brew gives you the perfect apple-shot to the kisser.”

Random: I also picked up two tee shirts from my favorite booth and some things from Migration Goods. Look them up. They have awesome stuff.

This beer poured with half a finger of tan head that dissipated instantly and left no lacing on the glass. The body was a dark walnut color with no visible carbonation due to the color. The nose was unique, to say the least. I picked up the expected apple and caramel notes and then the beer quickly went into roasted notes that were bordering on ashy. I had higher hopes for the taste, but was sadly disappointed. The first note I got was reminiscent of what I assume it would be to lick a lead pipe. It was insanely metallic, which took away from the other notes that I picked up of apple and caramel, and finished with light chocolate. The body was a medium thickness and it had enough carbonation for my taste. The finish was long, and unfortunately, still metallic. This was $2.49 for a 16 ounce tallboy, which broke down to $.16 per ounce. I don’t care if this beer was free, I wouldn’t have it again. What was even more odd was that the lawyer actually didn’t mind it, which is good because she picked it out.

Untappd Rating: 2.0/5.0

Horny Goat Watermelon Wheat

The week is finally over. After everything is said and done, I’ve worked 79 hours in a week. I’m shocked that I’m not asleep yet. Tonight, we’re just having a quiet night at home, which I definitely needed. Hopefully I can get a few reviews finished that were backlogged. Here’s the first one…


ABV: 5.6%

Style: American Pale Wheat Ale

Trivia: According to the brewery website, “We add 100% natural watermelon juice during fermentation so that all the sugar contributed is fermented off into alcohol, increasing the alcohol content while keeping the body light. The backbone of this brew is heavy on the wheat with just a touch of Vienna malt for complexity, while German hops balance the fruit perfectly. Watermelon Wheat offers an unbelievably refreshing and great tasting summer brew.”

Random: It’s finally starting to get cool. I can’t wait until it’s really fall weather.

This brew poured with a generous, three finger white head that dissipated quickly and left a little bit of lacing on the glass. The body was a clear, straw yellow with heavy carbonation present. The nose had some liquid watermelon Jolly Rancher with a touch of wheat. The taste was artificial watermelon with some honey sweetness. There was a bit of wheat as well, but watermelon flavor overwhelmed, and it wasn’t pleasant. The body was on the thinner side with medium carbonation. It had a long finish with wet cardboard and artificial watermelon. I wasn’t a fan of this brew and would not have it again. Although I like the use of watermelon, especially in summer beers, this one was a total miss.

Untappd Rating: 2.0/5.0

Horny Goat Laka Laka

I’m now watching the London portion of the travel DVD that I got on Netflix. They’ve visited a few places that I’ve been to in London, which is always cool to see. Anyways, this was a brew that the other half picked up a sixer of that she was nice enough to let me review. Let’s see how this one went.


ABV: 5.1%

Style: Hefeweizen

Trivia: According to the brewery website, “A refreshing and unique take on traditional German style wheat beer. Laka Laka has strong banana and clove notes from the yeast, a soft mouthfeel from the high wheat content in the malt bill, and pineapple juice added post-fermentation.”

Random: I’m curious to see if the Phils trade anyone before the deadline. They seem to be playing better lately.

This brew poured with a two finger, pure white head that dissipated while I wrote my intro (so, it was rather quick). There was no lacing left on the glass. There was a white crown left on the beer and was about an eighth of an inch high. The body was a warm yellow color that was very cloudy. It had moderate carbonation visible, despite the cloudiness. The nose started like a normal hefeweizen with banana, a touch of bubble gum, clove and wheat. Right at the end, fresh pineapple juice came through, but it didn’t overshadow the other flavors. Unfortunately, the nose was much better than the taste was. It started with banana and overly sweet pineapple juice. There was some clove there, but it didn’t work with the pineapple, making the brew very off balanced. Wheat was also present, but the major player here was pineapple juice. The body was on the thicker side of the style with high carbonation. It had a long and fruity finish. I really wanted to like this beer because I really enjoy pineapple. But, it was just too off balanced for me and I wouldn’t have it again.

Untappd Rating: 2.5/5.0

Horny Goat Hopped Up ‘N Horny

Another workday done before the long weekend. Katie and I went to the gym and then took the kid out for dinner. I think that she’s going to be in pain again tomorrow, as am I. But, I definitely feel better since I’ve been back in the gym. So, this is another beer from the six-pack that Katie picked…let’s see how it is.

ABV: 5.3%

Style: American Pale Ale

Trivia: According to the brewery website, “This IPA has just the right amount of hop love. We finish this brew off by dry hopping it with fresh Cascade hops, giving it a wonderful fresh citrus finish.” I guess BeerAdvocate and the brewery don’t agree on which style this one is…

Random: I love my foam roller. It really helps with the soreness. I think I have to buy Katie one.

The brew poured with a one finger head that dissipated quickly, but left some lacing on the glass. The body was a clear orange color with a huge amount of active carbonation…almost seltzer like. The nose started with grapefruit and quickly followed up with some sweet caramel malt. The taste was not exactly what I expected. This was definitely a malt forward pale ale. The hops and the grapefruit took a backseat on this one, big time. The sweet malt was upfront and carried throughout to the quick finish. The body was on the thinner side with lots of carbonation, almost too much. This beer was only okay for me. I would have liked to see more of a hop presence. I wouldn’t rush back to have this one again.

Untappd Rating: 3.0/5.0